Tuesday, August 15, 2006

Fifteen-O-Eight


1508... A day that will be hard for me to forget... My bestfriend is 25 years old today... We were like brothers... and today is his birthday...
A few years ago... When I was in my 3rd year... 2002... 2nd semester... Dekee went into a coma... It was Ramadhan... and I remembered waking up late and getting a lot of missed calls on my cell... What was wrong?? My gf miss called me (now my fiance), Dekee's gf called, his mom... What was wrong?? I have known Dekee to be some what of a careless driver sometimes because he has had a few minor accidents... and I was expecting and prepared for the worst... He was in the hospital... in the ICU... I rushed to pick up my gf and when we got there I could not stop crying... He was laying on a bed with tubes stuffed in everywhere possible... Dekee's sister was tellin me what had happened...
I was at the hospital most of the time... Spoke to him hoping that he could hear me and come back...

That was the begining of my fall... I was affected by this and god knows I would do anything to make him better... Lectures and assignments did not really matter and I was at a point where I wanted to quit my degree... I wasn't thinking straight... my lectures advised me not to... I had gone too far and they said Dekee would not want me to quit...

We had dreams... We wanted to travel around the world together... that's what bestfriends do... We were like brothers... We wanted to be somebody....

I have had dreams where I meet you... or accidentally bump into you... and you are well n we were talking and laughing like old times... it was so real... I miss you man...

Today is Dekee's Birthday... Happy Birthday man... I'm so ashamed to go over to your place... I do not know what to say to you... I do not know if I can face you... My heart aches to see you... You are still my friend and Brother... Until I get the courage to face you... I will always remember this day dekee.. I will always remember you and the things we did and talked about... God only knows how I feel... I pray for your well-being and also for your family's well-being... May His Al-Mighty bless you Md Hadiki and your beloved family... AMIN

"If we wait for the moment when everything, absolutely everything is ready, we
shall never begin."
by Ivan Turgenev

9 comments:

Anonymous said...

The original anonymous speaks

I feel for you.

Your message is not so clear
...what happened with Dekee? Is he still with us?

For what is worth....be strong and have faith. These two are importnat ingredients for a contented life.

As for Dekee...where ever he is, my prayer will always be there for him

Anonymous said...

yes, how is he now? is he still alive? why r u ashamed 2 face him?

whatever it is, don't wait till he's gone 2 tell him how much he meant and still means to u.

i have a bestfren too, a soulsista and we've had major up and downs but no matter what, we vow to always be there for each other. we fear to lose one another and cannot imagine it but we also remind each other to live on.

something happened to me during my 3rd yr of uni too, caused me to defer a yr. during my worse moments, she couldn't cope and wasnt much help, she was always missing n i was angry and disappointed but later on i saw that it was bcoz of fear. bcoz of fear she acted as if it was not happening and as a result almost lost me.

during my yr off it was our 1st time apart and she was not used to being 'alone' w/o me by her side. and i was 'alone' too, recovering by myself boz it was something i had 2 do alone.

but she realised that all she needed to do was hold on, n try her best 2 understand the pain i had gone thru and the healing process. and she did, and it helped. sometimes the best thing is time apart, even the closest of frenz need away time frm each other 2 dvelop. tip is 2 make positive use of it.

i came back healed and our friendship bcame stronger bcoz we discovered a lot about ourselves in that 1 yr. esp the true meaning of frenship. i knew she wud b rite there waiting for me.

we know our strength when we are at our weakest. and we also know who our true frenz are when we are in our deepest despair.

hope my story helped a bit. *hugs*

Anonymous said...

dekee went to leighton park, reading?

Zul-Fadly said...

Greetings Rebel,

At first I wasn't sure so I texted his Mom and she confirmed it. Dekee did go to leighton.

Anonymous said...

So your friend is OK now? Am confused with why you feel ashamed to see him. With friends I feel that there should never feel anything negative as it's all a learning process. In the bigger picture meeting him (and confronting your feelings about the issue) will be good for you both.
Good luck with it all!

Tulip said...

I miss him too Mas. Been a LONG time since we last visited him. We shud go one day to his house. All of us!

Zul-Fadly said...

OA - Dekee is at his home. I've heard some encouraging things and someone did ask me to go over and speak to him. I spoke to his mom recently and I have told her I will try to find time to visit them at their new crib.

Thank you so much for your support OA. One question - Are you a girl?

Anonymous said...

The Original Anonymous

Does my gender matter? If i reveal all..it will defeat the purpose of being anonymous. FYI, mystery is my middle name!!

Suffice to say, i have always thought your musings are interesting.

Im happy to know that Dekee is ok. Cherish your frens that are worth your loyalty, love and friendship.

Anonymous said...

Diki is a good friend. We went to school together at Leighton Park and spent many afternoons playing football after class. We shared a passion for Arsenal and the Simpsons. He is always full of life, joy and had great expectations for the future. I was devastated when i heard about his condition and felt guilty because i had not seen him since he left Leighton Park. I pray to Allah for his recovery and I long for the same Diki i knew from Leighton Park to return with his big smile.

Im glad to have met Diki and im sure he has touched many hearts like he did mine.